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Mark 12:1-11

¹²Then he began to speak to them in parables. ‘A man planted a vineyard, put a fence around it, dug a pit for the wine press, and built a watch-tower; then he leased it to tenants and went to another country. ²When the season came, he sent a slave to the tenants to collect from them his share of the produce of the vineyard. ³But they seized him, and beat him, and sent him away empty-handed. ⁴And again he sent another slave to them; this one they beat over the head and insulted.⁵Then he sent another, and that one they killed. And so it was with many others; some they beat, and others they killed. ⁶He had still one other, a beloved son. Finally he sent him to them, saying, “They will respect my son.” ⁷But those tenants said to one another, “This is the heir; come, let us kill him, and the inheritance will be ours.” ⁸So they seized him, killed him, and threw him out of the vineyard. ⁹What then will the owner of the vineyard do? He will come and destroy the tenants and give the vineyard to others. ¹⁰Have you not read this scripture:
“The stone that the builders rejected
   has become the cornerstone;^* 
11 this was the Lord’s doing,
   and it is amazing in our eyes”?’

 I have an embarrassing confession to make: I was halfway through writing my reflection when I realized that Jesus wasn’t siding with the tenants. I know this is absurd – call it quarantine-brain, where I am thicker, slower, and more forgetful than usual, and my usual is… not great. But I’m a tenant, and I automatically inserted myself into the story at the word I identified with most. And of course, I made myself the hero. Oops.
 
I am, of course, the tenant, but the tenant is not the protagonist. The tenant is a lazy cheat who hopes to get away with enjoying the fruits of the earth without giving back her fair share. That’s not how anyone likes to think of themselves, but in my case, it’s not inaccurate. 
 
I rent this body. I rent this time here on earth. I am reminded, in ways subtle and less so, that a renter can’t go through life taking up space and resources for free. But back to the message here: now that I know God is the vineyard owner, Jesus is the son, and poor shabby humanity is the tenants, the meaning is clear: get the message, or I’ll find some tenants who will. 
 
I don’t believe in storms sent as punishment or plagues sent to make a point. I don’t think COVID-19 is God’s judgement on earth. But like anything that makes a world wobble on its axis, whether it’s your own personal world or the whole planet, it does demand some stock-taking. The rent is due, and it’s not money, it’s things even more precious: patience, perseverance, kindness, courage, hard work, responsibility.

Psalm 6 

¹ Lord, do not rebuke me in your anger; *
do not punish me in your wrath.

² Have pity on me, Lord, for I am weak; *
heal me, Lord, for my bones are racked.

³ My spirit shakes with terror; *
how long, O Lord, how long?

⁴ Turn, O Lord, and deliver me; *
save me for your mercy's sake.

⁵ For in death no one remembers you; *
and who will give you thanks in the grave?

⁶ I grow weary because of my groaning; *
every night I drench my bed
and flood my couch with tears.

⁷ My eyes are wasted with grief *
and worn away because of all my enemies.

⁸ Depart from me, all evildoers, *
for the Lord has heard the sound of my weeping.

⁹ The Lord has heard my supplication; *
the Lord accepts my prayer.

¹⁰ All my enemies shall be confounded and quake with fear; *
they shall turn back and suddenly be put to shame.

What comes to me is the helplessness of this person. Today, all people want us to talk about is helplessness. But this passage reminds us that we’re always helpless, we are always under the control of God and that God is truly the only person that we can turn to to find control in life. In order to find control you have to give control to the Lord. And trust in God.
 
I was brought to Holy Apostles through my girlfriend Sarah and I think she presented this to me and my heart was open to it because I had allowed her into my heart, the same way that the speaker in the scripture opens his or her heart to the Lord. My time with Holy Apostles has allowed me to open up my heart too, to God. Although we’re in trying times now, it reminds me that there will be more trying times to come, as there will be joyful times and that every moment with God can be a joyful moment. 
 
Lent is certainly a time in the year when Christains reflect on their lives but I also would like to take this time to imagine my life and my life with the Church going forward. I look forward to a new day tomorrow while also enjoying today and reflecting on yesterday. h

Lamentations 1:1-2

How lonely sits the city that was once full of people. Wow. So I’ve been trying to spend as much time outside with my family as possible because everyone seems to benefit from the space and the unconfined feeling. So during this time it means the yard. Our dog is very happy as she spends her time “hunting” for squirrels. The rest of us play, dig up weeds,  bask in the sun, and chat with neighbors and friends when they pass by. We stand 6 feet apart, across the fence from each other and grouse, commiserate, share updates and look for some silver linings in this experience. This a very important part of being outside—remembering that there are people out there. All the while the stream of ambulance sirens remind us that we aren’t just a happy family playing soccer in the yard. We are folks living in a global pandemic that will leave marks on all of us. The strangeness of the joy of being outside in the sun and the general feeling of something is closing in on us live side by side. We are people who are faithful, fearful and asking for God’s help.

I like the way the author of Lamentations personifies the city itself. I wonder what personified New York would be doing right now. Probably weeping. I wonder if boastful New York has anyone to comfort her? I wonder if she would accept help if she were offered any—she strikes me as someone who likes to be able to go it alone. But maybe now in this time, she sees how none of us can go it alone.

I’m very grateful for God right now. This morning during the reading of the passion I kept getting chills listening, feeling the reading was newly alive for me. I could connect in new and different ways to understanding what Jesus did for all of us and how God loves us.