Lenten Daily Reflection 2021-02-20
You can listen to the reading and reflection by clicking here.
Bow down your ear, O Lord, and answer me *
for I am poor, and in misery.
Keep watch over my life, for I am faithful *
save your servant who puts his trust in you.
Be merciful to me, O Lord, for you are my God *
I call upon you all the day long.
Gladden the soul of your servant *
for to you, O Lord, I lift up my soul.
For thou, O Lord, are good and forgiving *
and great is your love toward all who call upon you.
Give ear, Lord, to my prayer, *
and attend to the voice of my supplications.
The boldness that David has to make his requests to God so clearly, directly, and honestly feels out of place for me. For me to request that the God of the universe would bow down and listen to my pleas feels uncomfortable and undeserving. One would think that out of all times in our lives, the chaos and struggle of this last year in the pandemic would cause me to be crying out on my knees on a daily basis; why hasn’t that been my posture? If I’m honest, after the long suffering that doesn’t seem to let up and the continuing stress, I hold doubts that my prayers will do anything or even be heard. I so quickly default to handling things on my own, believing that calling out to God feels like a waste of time; I’ll just do it myself because at least I can see the results of my actions and trust in something tangible. And with my resources, privilege, and skills, I can handle a lot on my own, or at least believe that I can. It’s in the pausing and slowing down, when I stop trying to frantically keep all the plates spinning in my day-to-day, when the truth of my discomfort and pain appears front and center. In those moments, I can choose to try and brush over it all with more of my attempts at control, or I can humbly request that the Creator, the Provider, the Father of all of us, wants to hear what I need and has a never-ending source of love for me. For me.